Do you have rejection ants?
Ants (Automatic negative thoughts) can multiply to infestation levels after repeated rejections. I wonder what words of wisdom the Jericho community has for sufferers?
I suspect there’s going to be a gender divide (ooh, controversial!) on the advice, but I’m prepared to be proved wrong.
Hi Heather, Sophie Hannah is the guru for this type of stuff! She did a session for us at the Summer Festival of Writing about her coaching programme for writers to learn to change their thought patterns, so helpful. It’s on replay if you are a ticket holder. I tweeted the basic premise of her philosophy a while ago too which has helped me cope with (many) rejections here: https://twitter.com/sophielflynn/status/1259941343398371330
I’m curious what the gender-divide alternate advice is expected to be. Because I’m pretty sure my suggestion to use cinnamon isn’t it.
I promise to reveal the gender-divide when all the advice is in. In the interim, cinnamon for actual ants is a good tip I hadn’t heard before.
Gender-divide? Yea you must be right, because if Rick is suggesting cinnamon and I’m suggesting honey…
But in all seriousness, when it comes to rejection there are a number of ways to go about it, depending on the type of rejection.
1. You can take the feedback you’re given, and work on your novel. It can be a sort of “self-reflect” type thing, where instead of mourning over it, you can focus on yourself and your novel and work to improve🙏
2. Take time to focus on yourself.
Focus on yourself, remind yourself who you are. If you need to take a break, take break. Do something for yourself, even it’s small. You can cook something, read a new book, watch good movie or even buy yourself something nice. Treat yourself, remember your worth. There’s no one more important than yourself, so act like it. Even if an agent rejects you, it’s not a no it’s a not now. So even if you feel sad, lift your spirits up because you’re still amazing and you’re going to make it one day.
3. I wasn’t joking about the honey. Have you tasted tea with honey? Awesome
Cinnamon is for use on the ants…
Oh really? I use bug spray 😂
Cinnamon overpowers their sense of smell. It effetively blinds them when they are near it.
Cool, I’ll try that, thanks! It’s ant season here
And smells amazing!
I find the best way is to remove the thought that they are rejecting me as a person, focussing on them rejecting something that I’ve offered that they didn’t happen to want. I don’t necessarily specifically reject all the clothes in a shop but if they’re offering a style that I don’t happen to want I will leave empty-handed even though the quality of everything there might be very good.
I think agents are in a difficult position with the flood of mixed material, some of which is bound to be excellent. If I was trying to construct a playlist of only 20 songs out of the millions that are available today I would have to reject some truly magnificent work. Sometimes rather than choosing positively ones which I wanted, it would be easier to prune by losing some for thin reasons like it was a bit gloomy, my mother never liked it, stupid title etc.
I think when agents are presented with such a volume of work to sift through that they are almost looking for a reason to reject it because it’ll prune down their to-do pile. I therefore try to not give them an obvious/easy reason to reject me: hence carefully thought out approach letter, checked for errors, following submission guidelines carefully, choosing the right kind of agents etc.
I also like to look at it as if you have many ships out trading then you may have some chance of the ships coming home to port with something of value. If one of my 10 ships then crashes (often!) my hopes don’t sink with it as I have another nine ships out there that I can keep my dreams pinned to.
And chocolate helps..
I like the clothes shop comparison. One size does not fit all! And I suppose what the hundreds of rejections that the likes of J.K. Rowling received teaches us is timing (aka Luck) also has a large part to play.
Feeling a bit sorry for ants…
Death by cinnamon? I’m sure there are worse ways to go.
Mmmm maybe nutmeg would be worse?
The cinnamon doesn’t kill them. It just confuses them, so they go elsewhere.
Even better! and child friendly too.
Mmm – maybe nutmeg would be worse
Well, thanks everyone for all the encouragement; I haven’t even started to submit my work yet, now I’m totally devastated a thee thought of it.
I just wanted to write a little story and see my name in print (okay, I know, totally naive) and now I’m scared stiff of those agent vultures. I don’t know about ants, it’s more like hyenas (How’d You Ever Nail an Agent?) in my mind!
Ah, but Tina… your writing has been in print. Or as close as this digital world allows; I refer you to the post directly above this reply.
I know agents can feel like vultures – circling, hunting, seeking that easy 10% they can pick off and be on their way – but the truth is that the viulture anaolgy applies to lawyers, and they are after the 90%.
Agents are not in the game to pick and run. A good agent is looking for the gem they can polish and place in the right piece of jewelery. They are looking to enhance value. A good book may earn you, on its own, say 100 units (of whatever currency you are meauirng this in). But with a good agent, it will find the right publisher, it will be packaged and presented just right, and it will earn 200 units. Or maye 500. Sometimes 10000. So, even though your agent is taking a 10% cut – of the 10k, they are taking ten times what you would ahve earned on yout own – you are walking away with significantly more because of their effort. A good agent will stick with their clients, building a relationship over a career (which isn’t to say that there aren’t times that it is right for writer and agent to part company; a good agent will also know when they are not the best agent).
What agents know – they have intense experience to guide them – is that polishing a handful of dirt only gives them a handful of dust. Polishing a dull rock does not turn it into something more. They need to find a diamond, then turn their skill to selling it to the jeweller (editor) who can give it just the right cut.
The problem, for most writers, is that they lack the agent’s experience. They cannot tell the difference between a lump of coal and a diamond. Carbon, after all, is carbon.
Oh, Rick, this is brilliant – I particularly like ‘polishing a handful of dirt gives you a handful of dust’. Perfect 😀
So True. That’s why my rock-polishing kit is now a doorstop.
Just reminding myself of a Confucius quote for a reply to Harry’s post on muses. And came across this one:
“A lion chased me up a tree, and I greatly enjoyed the view from the top.”
Seems like something to keep in mind when dealing with editor/agent/publisher feedback.
-Heather
at the – silly self correction on the computer.
Hi Tina,
Nail an agent: A bit of two by four, a dozen twelve inch nails, and a hammer.
Seriously, it is helpful to read what Harry Bingham has to say about agents. He gives you both sides of the story. The ‘take away’ message (I took) is they are mostly dedicated people who want to fall in love with your work.
My intention with this post was to gather (in one place) the various methods used to turn the rejection frown around. It doesn’t seem like its going to do that, but the post ‘savaged by a bear’ has caught the Townhouse vibe and has some excellent ideas. The ‘take away’ of which might be summarized as ‘get support from other writers because they know how you feel’. And the good news is we have, in Jericho, found the place to do that.
Al the best, Heather.
I think there’s a certain time of day for Ants to appear; if, like me you are a night person, ants come out in the morning and I suspect the reverse is true.
My best way to combat them is to exercise, run, tennis, or just walk in the morning and let the endorphins take the fight to them!