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Jeez. Ideally, I guess, but that sounds like a bit of a tall order for a mere mortal such as myself! Definitely we should have most of this by the first page, but rudimentary plot and conflict? If this isn’t all in place by the end of the first chapter, then you’re definitely doing something wrong.
What’s your view?
Totally agree. It’s a very tall order for just one para.
I think this is quite a long list to fit in just one paragraph. Let’s see how I’m doing:
> Distinctive voice? Yes
> POV? Yes
> Rudimentary plot? Uhmm… no
> Hint of characterization? Yes
> Setting? Sort of, maybe
> Conflit? Uhmm… not yet but coming up next.
The thing is, I’ve got all of those elements in the the first page, but not just in the very fisrt paragraph. I think this is one of those “rules” that do not always apply. Now I’m off to look for successful novels that do not have all of those elements in the first paragraph. Just to prove my point… will be back with my findings.
What about your first para? Were you able to fit in all of the above?
Here’s the first paragraph from one of the best novels I have ever read (Guy Gavriel Kay’s Sailing to Sarantium):
Distinctive voice: Only insofar as a mastery of language
POV: No
Rudimentary plot: Nope
Hint of characterization: Of humanity in general, and historians in particular – a touch.
Setting: Named but not described.
Conflit: Again, no. We do not know how Apius died.
Theme: Yes. (Permanence and legacy, though only apparent in retrospect.)
Absolutely not. My opening line – and opening paragraph – is:
“I…”
Which quite obviously fails on pretty much every one of those points. Except, perhaps, the character’s voice, though that is not obvious from the brevity.
Some of the best writers I know would fall flat on their faces based on that principle. They, instead, wield words as sharp implements, conjuring atmosphere, or subtly revealing theme through a comment on the human condition.
Love your first line! Wonder what comes next…
I’ll keep that for the beta read.
Haha! Love it! 😁
Now that is actually a pretty intriguing first line Rick. Way better than trying to cram the whole story into one sentence.
Thank you, Kate.
sounds a bit ambitious, unless you’re doing a six word story I guess!
Completely disagree. Far too much to cram into a single paragraph, especially the first one the reader experiences. For a start it would be half a page long at minimum… unless your plot is a very simple one!
I agree the tone of voice of the book should come across this early, certainly. Arguably so should the (main) POV. The first few line(s) should also set up an ‘unknown’ – something the reader wants to find out about – that elusive ‘hook’ that we all discuss so much!.
Ideally that ‘unknown’ should reflect or hint at the theme that runs through the book, but that’s an added bonus. And the first line or two should certainly captivate the reader.
But ‘plot’ and ‘conflict’? Nah. Those will develop over the first few pages, maybe. Sometimes longer. Ditto setting. Let it all evolve slowly, as a mystery to be explored, rather than thumped home as done and dusted in the first few lines.
This feels like one of those reductive ‘rules’ that takes a set of general, sometimes useful, principles and forces everything to conform to it regardless of individual need or style, and thus to be taken with a bushel of salt.
Totally agree, Jon. Was sitting in front of my bookcase when I read this, so I’ve been flicking through a few openings to see if all is this is operant the seven days off Evelyn Hardcastle by Stuart Turton – nope. Costa shortlisted A God in ruins by Kate Atkinson – nope. Booker winner the blind assassin by Margaret Atwood – covers most of this but no hint at plot, I’d say. Randomly chosen books, all huge critical and financial successes
I tested my first paragrph (three sentences and 48 words) against this ‘rule’.
***
One of Membra’s surgeons, thinking to be kind, had told her once that those who had lost limbs sometimes regained them in their dreams. For Membra that had never been the case. And so, in dreams and waking, she had taught herself how best to do without them.
Distinctive voice: For others to decide, but I’d like to think it’s there to a degree.
POV: Not really explicit, although I suppose it establishes the 3rd person cinematic narration, and the viewpoint character is introduced by name.
Plot: Nope.
Characterisation: I suppose it hints at the character’s ‘can do’ attitude. But nothing detailed.
Setting: Nope. Nary a peep.
Conflict: Nope. Except a very vague allusion to the protagonist’s inner conflict, and that only by inference.
***
So maybe 1.5/6? Maybe 2. Fail! D-. See me after the class. 😀 What it does do, though, (at least I hope) is provoke a ‘what the…?’ reaction from the reader. And it indirectly sets up and ties into the theme of the novel. Which is, I think, all it needs to do… at least at this point.
This first para has only got a hint of something, a rudimentary plot maybe. It would fail flat on its face on all the other elements. Yet my beta-readers found it intriguing.
The letter that had just arrived in the port was unremarkable except for the thickeness of the envelope.
I like that! Just a hint of strangeness. But leaves exactly what’s causing the envelope to be thicker than expected up to the reader’s imagination.
Jon, yours is a very good first line. It engages the reader and immediately raises the questions: Who is Membra? Why hasn’t she got any limbs? Raising questions in the reader’s mind is what first lines should do IMHO (In My Humble Opinion).
It’s the kind of statement that actually makes me slightly grumpy, as a host of aspiring writers or there will feel they’re failures if they can’t achieve this lofty goal.
That’s quite a tall order for a first line. Like Rick, I don’t think mine ticks off any of those boxes. I suppose it’s possible that some people would say there’s evidence of a distinctive voice. I think that depends on the reader. However, by the end of the first paragraph – all 3 sentences and 74 words of it – I think I’ve ticked off all boxes except for establishing the main conflict on the story.
I feel sometimes writers obsess too much about their first line and first paragraph. No all successful novels have a killer first line or a first paragraph that loaded with everything mentioned above.
And sometimes, on a slightly divergent note, they obsess over their first line/page/paragraph to the exclusion of the rest of the book.
I’m looking for a successfull novel that has ALL the above on the first para, and so far haven’t found a single one. If you find one — just a single one — shout to us.
Meanwhile, we shall all wait in this echoing silence of eternity…
At the risk of having trash thrown at me, I think this does a pretty good job.
First line: I’d never given much thought to how I would die – though I’d had reason enough in the last few months – but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this.
And continues: I stared without breathing across the long room, into the dark eyes of the hunter, and he looked pleasantly back. Surely it was a good day to die, in the place of someone else, someone I loved. Noble, even. That ought to count for something.
Ok, the setting is just a room, but the town is named in the next paragraph. And you did just say ‘successful novel’. Nobody mentioned quality!
Anybody recognise it? 😀
Ok, I’ve never read this novel. I’m not into vampires. But I sort of recognized the line from somewhere, and so put it through google.
Result: Twilight by Stephenie Myer.
But still, it does not have all the listed elements in the first para. And needs a second para to expand. Close…
Yes – go to the top if the class. Or maybe the bottom.
I feel they’re all there. Now I think someone needs to drag us completely into the gutter and check 50 Shades of Grey’s opening!
Would be interesting to compare number of hits between popular and more classic novels.
Here you go (extracted from Amazon look-inside):
(From the list, I would say it hits at-most half.)
Does that count as having trash thrown at you?
I’m ducking. That is truly terrible! I’m going to shelve my comparison experiment in case I lose my mind,
Can’t beat a ‘describe your character by having them look at themselves in a mirror’ moment! Always a classic. 😈
Speaking of which… I read 50 Shades (well, not all of it but it kept repeating itself chapter after chapter, so I guess that counts as read) and the thing that worked for me was the protagonist’s arc: she was curious to begin with, but then got entangled in the strange relationship and really liked the guy at the end, but walked away from him. So, the protagonist’s arc was not bad.
Spoiler!