#24743
Giselle
gisdelsol
Participant

Hello Jen.
It must have taken a lot of courage to write that chapter after what you’ve gone through, and I’m sorry for your loss.
I’m going to echo Kate and Bella. I’m afraid that I wasn’t pulled in until you got to the accident. The writing was fluid, and there are some delightful phrases (How swiftly and savagely things can change, for instance, which just floored me), but I found myself skimming it.
The last two paragraphs are gripping, and I agree with Bella that that may be a good place to start.
I think you can indeed “weave the essence” of this introduction elsewhere, as you touch upon many things – your time with friends, your relationship with the children, your everyday life and plans for the future.
That’s just one opinion, to be used or ignored at will. You know your story best.
I don’t know if you’ve read Joan Didion’s ‘The Year of Magical Thinking’, which she wrote after her husband literally dropped dead at the dinner table? She starts with the accident and follows with the fall out and her reactions over the next year.
Learning from tragedy is powerful, and you’ve got good premise here. I’d read more.