{"id":6680,"date":"2021-12-10T14:00:00","date_gmt":"2021-12-10T14:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/townhouse\/articles\/the-opposite-of-mr-koontz\/"},"modified":"2021-12-10T14:00:00","modified_gmt":"2021-12-10T14:00:00","slug":"the-opposite-of-mr-koontz","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/the-opposite-of-mr-koontz\/","title":{"rendered":"The opposite of Mr Koontz"},"content":{"rendered":"

Last week we pondered the awkward prose and strange success of Dean Koontz. Today \u2013 rather stupidly \u2013 I\u2019m going to do the opposite.<\/p>\n

Our theme this week is Hamnet <\/em>by Maggie O\u2019Farrell. The book deals with the death of Shakespeare\u2019s son, Hamnet. (The two names, Hamnet and Hamlet were used more or less interchangeably in Shakespeare\u2019s time. Shakespeare wrote the play a few years after the death of his son.)<\/p>\n

The book is obviously Great Literature. My copy is jam-packed with superlative reviews and the book won both the Women\u2019s Prize for Fiction in the UK and the National Book Critics Circle prize for fiction in the US.<\/p>\n

So: serious critical heft, plus it talks about Shakespeare, so what\u2019s not to love?<\/p>\n

Well, when we were looking at Dean Koontz last week, we thought that some of his writing habits are there to reassure his readers that they\u2019re going to get what they came for.<\/p>\n

Koontz\u2019s readers don\u2019t want fancy writing, so Koontz is quick to reassure them: buddy, you\u2019re not going to get any. On the other hand, they do want big, clear, comic-book style characters, and Koontz makes sure he places one prominently on page one.<\/p>\n

I suggested that that Koontz\u2019s approach to prose was like a box of cheaper chocolates, where the point of the packaging was to reassure shoppers, \u201cThis is not too fancy. If you feel worried by fancy, expensive chocolates, we promise that you won\u2019t find any of that stuff inside.\u201d<\/p>\n

But how about the opposite? If you\u2019re buying fancy chocolates, you want the packaging to match. Elegant fonts, dark colours, plenty of layers of foil and fluffy packaging and fancy tissue. The packaging says, \u201cYou want fancy? We\u2019re going to give you fancy. Worried that these chocolates won\u2019t pass muster at your posh dinner party? Don\u2019t worry. We\u2019ve got six layers of fancy tissue and each chocolate comes in its own mini-wrapping, so your guests are just going to KNOW that you\u2019ve spent real money on this box.\u201d<\/p>\n

OK. Hold that thought.<\/p>\n

Here are some bits from Hamnet<\/em>:<\/p>\n

Quote 1<\/strong><\/p>\n

You might find the [edge of the forest] a restless, verdant, inconstant sight: the wind caresses, ruffles, disturbs the mass of leaves; each tree answers to the weather\u2019s ministrations at a slightly different tempo from its neighbour, bending and shuddering and tossing its branches as if trying to get away from the air, from the very soil that nourishes it.<\/em><\/p>\n

Quote 2<\/strong><\/p>\n

The words fly out of her mouth, like hornets, words she didn\u2019t even know she knew, words that dart and crackle and maim, words that twist and mangle her tongue.<\/em><\/p>\n

Quote 3<\/strong><\/p>\n

He gives a nod and a shrug, all at the same time, eyeing the broad back of his father, who looms behind his mother, still facing the street. He is, despite himself, despite the fact that he is clutching the hand of the woman he has vowed to marry, despite everything working out which way he will have to duck to avoid the inevitable fist, to feint, to parry, and to shield Agnes from the blows he knows will come.<\/em><\/p>\n

Two things before we go on.<\/p>\n

One, please look at those quotes and see what you think of them. Forget that you are reading a hugely successful work of literary fiction. What do you think of the quotes on the page?<\/p>\n

Two, I\u2019m going to have some challenging things to say about those snippets of writing, but I\u2019m not so daft as to think that Maggie O\u2019Farrell can\u2019t write. There\u2019s plenty of excellent writing in the book \u2013 just, I\u2019m not sure she nails it every time.<\/p>\n

Right-o. So let\u2019s dig in.<\/p>\n

Quote 1, comments<\/strong><\/p>\n

You might find the [edge of the forest] a restless, verdant, inconstant sight: the wind caresses, ruffles, disturbs the mass of leaves; each tree answers to the weather\u2019s ministrations at a slightly different tempo from its neighbour, bending and shuddering and tossing its branches as if trying to get away from the air, from the very soil that nourishes it.<\/em><\/p>\n

If I were being mean about this snippet (and I am), I think I\u2019d point out the following:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Verdant <\/em>means covered with thick green foliage<\/em> and it\u2019s a word almost never used in ordinary speech. It\u2019s what you might expect from a Victorian poetess. Any more recent usage tends to feel like it\u2019s straining a bit too hard.<\/li>\n
  2. Restless <\/em>and inconstant <\/em>mean much the same thing. Certainly, it\u2019s not clear that both are needed here. What is the additional word supposed to add?<\/li>\n
  3. On the topic of pointless repetition, caresses, ruffles and disturbs<\/em> seems like repetition for the sake of it.\u00a0<\/li>\n
  4. When O\u2019Farrell writes the mass of leaves<\/em>, she could just as well have written the leaves<\/em>. The word mass adds a kind of pretension without any useful addition to meaning.<\/li>\n
  5. The weather\u2019s ministrations<\/em>: the use of the word weather <\/em>here seems like an awkward way of repeating the word wind<\/em>. But she doesn\u2019t really mean weather<\/em>; she definitely means wind<\/em>. So the sentence needed a bit of a rethink\u2026\u00a0<\/li>\n
  6. And the word ministrations <\/em>is rather like verdant<\/em>: do you ever actually use the word if you\u2019re not straining to sound posh? I\u2019d suggest mostly not.<\/li>\n
  7. On the matter of a slightly different tempo from its neighbour \u2013 I actually liked this. Different trees do move in different ways, as do their leaves. So a poplar alternates rapidly between showing a darker upper leaf, and a more silvery underside. A beech behaves differently. An oak differently again. If O\u2019Farrell had offered us some detail of observation along those lines, we might actually see something new in nature \u2013 taking stock of something we\u2019d seen but never before noticed. As it is, the comment is blandly general and getting close to a statement of the obvious.<\/li>\n
  8. When we get to bending and shuddering and tossing its branches<\/em>, then once again I think we mostly have repetition for the sake of it. I\u2019m not even sure that trees do shudder. That implies a rapid repetitive movement which is not really how trees behave.<\/li>\n
  9. And trees moving in the wind suggests that they\u2019re trying to escape from the air and the soil? Really? I mean, I love a tasty metaphor, but for me this just seems like a fail. A big, bold image that in the end just feels unconvincing.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Quotes 2 and 3, comments<\/strong><\/p>\n

    I\u2019m not going to comment on these passages at length, except that now we\u2019ve noticed O\u2019Farrell\u2019s habit of repetition, it\u2019s hard to un-notice it \u2013 and it doesn\u2019t feel better on further acquaintance.<\/p>\n

    But do just take a note of this: \u2018The words fly out of her mouth, like hornets<\/em>\u2019. These words are clearly not very like hornets, since they dart and crackle and maim none of which are things that hornets do. These words also twist and mangle the woman\u2019s tongue and you\u2019d have to be a very muscular (and peculiar) hornet to do that. The thing that hornets are best known for doing is stinging people, and there\u2019s no mention of sting here. So: these words aren\u2019t really like hornets at all, are they?<\/p>\n

    Presumably, O\u2019Farrell knows that, so why does she write it?<\/p>\n

    Well, I think two things. First, there\u2019s the literary attraction to the big, bold metaphor, and the attraction remains, even when the metaphor isn\u2019t sound. And secondly, if you want to cut a dash with book critics, then some great tips are:<\/p>\n

      \n
    1. Write about Shakespeare or adapt a story of Shakespeare\u2019s (Jane Smiley, A Thousand Acres<\/em>) , or adapt another classic tale (Madeline Miller, The Song of Achilles<\/em>), or \u00a0\u2026<\/li>\n
    2. Make sure that, every now and then, you talk about words themselves, or sentences, or parts of speech, or vowels, etc. That way, you\u2019re showing proper deference to the tools of the literary trade<\/li>\n
    3. Use fashionable phrases where you can. \u2018Freighted with a cargo of X\u2019 for example is an excellent way to say \u201cpossesses X\u201d for pretty much every possible instance of X.<\/li>\n
    4. Use some fancy words (verdant, not green)<\/li>\n
    5. Toss in plenty of verbs, in lists.<\/li>\n
    6. Use semi-colons freely \u2013 or avoid them completely. Doesn\u2019t matter which: you just need a clearly visible policy.<\/li>\n
    7. And so on! This list is definitely not exhaustive.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      The opposite of Mr Koontz<\/strong><\/p>\n

      The truth is you can write a terrific novel and still fall prey to some of the weaknesses of Literary Writing \u2013 no novel is perfect, after all.<\/p>\n

      But as with Mr Koontz, I think part of it has to do with wrapping and how you appeal to your target market. In the end, it\u2019s the chocolate itself that matters. But clever packaging is a smart way to market yourself to your target audience.<\/p>\n

      It\u2019s not just Dean Koontz that does that, it\u2019s prize-winning Maggie O\u2019Farrell too. And hell, it\u2019s not just those two: it\u2019s all of us. Nowt wrong with that. But we still need to make sure that the writing passes muster. The writing has to come first.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

      Last week we pondered the awkward prose and strange success of Dean Koontz. Today \u2013 rather stupidly \u2013 I\u2019m going to do the opposite. Our theme this week is Hamnet by Maggie O\u2019Farrell. The book deals with the death of Shakespeare\u2019s son, Hamnet. (The two names, Hamnet and Hamlet were used more or less interchangeably<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":32,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29292],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6680","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-harrys-friday-email"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nJericho Writers<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/the-opposite-of-mr-koontz\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The opposite of Mr Koontz – Jericho Writers\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Last week we pondered the awkward prose and strange success of Dean Koontz. 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I've published trad & self-pub. Love both. Best known for my Fiona Griffiths crime series. Oh yes, and I'm the capo di tutti capi at Jericho Writers.","url":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/author\/harryjericho\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6680","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/32"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6680"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6680\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6680"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6680"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6680"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}