Many authors have been accused of the sin of writing purple prose over the years. Harriet Beecher Stowe\u2019s \u2018Uncle Tom’s Cabin\u2019 oozes mushy sentimentality, with sentences such as, \u2018Even so, beloved Eva! Fair star of thy dwelling! Thou art passing away; but they that love thee dearest know it not.\u2019 Even though it was written in 1852 when such contrivances were more accepted, this is still considered one of the most purple of the classic texts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Another great example is this short extract from Jim Theis\u2019s 1970 fantasy novella, The Eye of Argon <\/em>which seeps purple prose from every pore. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018Glancing about the dust swirled room in the gloomily dancing glare of his flickering cresset, Grignr eyed evidences of the enclosure being nothing more than a forgotten storeroom. Miscellaneous articles required for the maintenance of a castle were piled in disorganized heaps at infrequent intervals toward the wall opposite the barbarian’s piercing stare.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you\u2019re worried your writing might be tinged with too much purple, take a look at the following red flags, and read how to make your writing leaner and more readable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Writers love adjectives, but if used excessively they become a distraction, interfering with your story and making your prose a deep shade of purple. William Strunk and E.B. White, in The Elements of Style<\/em>, say: \u2018Write with nouns and verbs, not with adjectives and adverbs.\u2019 <\/p>\n\n\n\n Scrutinise every adjective in your writing and consider how it earns its place. If you can do without it, delete it. For example, if you\u2019re describing a lawn, only use the word \u2018green\u2019 if that\u2019s out of the ordinary. Or find a stronger noun that doesn\u2019t need an adjective at all \u2013 for example \u2018light rain\u2019 could be replaced with \u2018drizzle.\u2019 And try to avoid using two adjectives if one will do, as increasing the number of adjectives before a noun severely reduces its clout and makes your prose even more purple. The same goes for adverbs. Does the drunk person \u2018walk erratically\u2019 or do they \u2018stagger\u2019?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Pro tip: Use your thesaurus with caution. It will throw up all sorts of unnecessary distractions your story doesn\u2019t need. Only use a thesaurus to help you recall known words.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Good writers use adjectives and adverbs<\/a> sparingly. Cut them with care and decide if your sentences seem less purple as a result.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Every definition of purple prose highlights the excessive use of long, winding and overly dramatic sentences. By the time your reader has reached the end, they won\u2019t remember where they began. The following example is by Victorian writer, Jerome K. Jerome in his book, Three Men in a Boat<\/em>. He was writing at a time when authors were paid by the word, so perhaps we can forgive him for this lyrical, but rather convoluted and distinctly purple sentence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2018The river\u2014with the sunlight flashing from its dancing wavelets, gilding gold the grey-green beech-trunks, glinting through the dark, cool wood paths, chasing shadows o’er the shallows, flinging diamonds from the mill-wheels, throwing kisses to the lilies, wantoning with the weirs’ white waters, silvering moss-grown walls and bridges, brightening every tiny townlet, making sweet each lane and meadow, lying tangled in the rushes, peeping, laughing, from each inlet, gleaming gay on many a far sail, making soft the air with glory\u2014is a golden fairy stream.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n Did reading that make you a little breathless? Be kind to your reader and keep an eye out for overly long sentences. Limit the number of clauses and play with length, mixing up shorter and longer sentences to give your writing a sense of rhythm. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Some authors unwittingly make their prose purple by sledge-hammering emotions onto the page, especially when describing a visceral reaction to a situation. Trust your reader to get it without telling them twenty times in twenty different ways. Of course, much depends on the genre of your writing. Romantic fiction readers will be more tolerant of a little emotional embellishment than steely-eyed crime fiction fans. <\/p>\n\n\n\n As you write or edit, think about whether the magnitude of the reaction matches the event. Will your main character\u2019s breast heave that<\/em> violently at the sight of her love interest? Or will Philip\u2019s teeth really gnash and his brow drip with sweat on hearing that Sally has been promoted ahead of him? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Think of other ways to create authentic tension without resorting to purple prose.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you\u2019re unsure how to go about this, identify the essence of your scene; what really matters? Make it exciting in its own right and don\u2019t rely on flowery language to jazz it up. The story, not the distracting writing, should be the thing that grabs the reader\u2019s attention. And if you\u2019ve forgotten what\u2019s going on, then so will your reader!<\/p>\n\n\n\n A reliance on clich\u00e9s is considered the number one crime in creative writing, and for good reason. Clich\u00e9s are lazy shortcuts to expressing an emotion or situation, suggesting the writer hasn\u2019t been able to think up their own words. They\u2019re old and boring and offer nothing to surprise or shock your reader. Examples of purple prose across the internet cite the deployment of clich\u00e9s as a key feature.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Every first draft will have the odd clich\u00e9 skulking in its shadows, but if you spot one, get rid of it. And then say what you\u2019re trying to say in your own words. Clich\u00e9s will only hint at your inexperience, so be brutal and delete those tired old phrases without mercy. <\/p>\n\n\n\n If you\u2019re struggling to spot clich\u00e9s in your writing, ask a friend or beta reader to read it through or consider signing up for one of our creative writing courses<\/a> to help you identify problem areas such as this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n All of the above conspire to create writing that lacks clarity. Imagine for a moment you\u2019re the reader of your book. You\u2019re walking through a forest, surrounded by new and exciting sights, but as you progress, the path turns to mud. It sucks at your boots, slowing your pace. Brambles run their thorns along your bare arms and mosquitos nip at your cheeks. The birds screech, laughing at your sluggish progress. You\u2019re desperate now to get to your destination, but come upon a patch of tall nettles. You beat your way through, your shins stinging \u2026 <\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019m getting a little carried away here, but do you get my point? When a piece of prose becomes too purple, the overly-ornate text becomes an impediment to the reader\u2019s progress and they\u2019ll simply turn back and go home, or put your book down. As an author, it\u2019s your job to take your reader by the hand and guide your reader to the end of the story without unnecessary hurdles to impede their progress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The following extract from Sean Penn\u2019s debut novel, Bob Honey<\/em>, is a perfect example of an author\u2019s purple prose affecting clarity<\/a>. Even though the book is a satire, the text is as impenetrable as my imaginary forest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThere is pride to be had where the prejudicial is practiced with precision in the trenchant triage of tactile terminations. This came to him via the crucible-forged fact that all humans are themselves animal, and that rifle-ready human hunters of alternately-species prey should best beware the raging ricochet that soon will come their way.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n I think Mr Penn is trying to say something about hunting animals, but I really can\u2019t be sure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So, how do you make sure your writing never lacks clarity? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Leave plenty of time between writing and editing so you can read your work with fresh eyes. Does it make sense? Do you<\/em> understand what you\u2019re writing about after time away from it? Is anything confusing? Think how you could make it clearer using the advice listed above. If you\u2019re still not sure, ask a beta reader to help, or consider using our editorial services<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It takes skill and experience to write with clarity, so remember, as you write, focus on your story, and keep your reader in mind. Do you really want them to battle their way through that forest, arriving battered and bruised at their destination, or would you rather they enjoyed the journey?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Even if your writing isn\u2019t that purple, or only purple in patches, thinking about the above will help your writing become tighter and more effective. Keep your reader in mind as you write. Ensure every word, sentence, paragraph and scene drives the story on.<\/p>\n\n\n\nPurple Prose Red Flags:<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
1. Too Many Adjectives And Adverbs<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
2. Excessive Sentence Length<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
3. Excessive Emotion<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jerichowriters.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/purple-flowers-1.jpg\")
<\/figure>\n\n\n\n4. Generic Or Clich\u00e9d Images<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
5. Lack Of Clarity<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
How To Write Tight, Effective Prose<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n